Friday, 19 August 2011

Y is for… you know when you’re a Yorkshire lass because…

… you like the rain! Last night it rained- a lot. At times it was the fine drizzle, you know, the stuff that ‘gets you really wet.’ Then the heavens would open and huge, fat dollops of rain fell on my head- soaking me through to my knickers. And I loved it.
                Because I am braving the English weather to go camping this weekend (when hopefully it will not rain) I had to endure my long run last night. It said 11 miles on my calendar. I didn’t believe the calendar- it has lied to me before about hill running and speed running (!) in the past, so I consulted my half marathon training book and it said I should be running 12 miles. Needless to say, I referred back to my good old trusted friend, the calendar! I didn’t realise it was raining until I opened my front door- lycra firmly in place, impatient woman on the micoach asking if we could ‘start the workout’ now and fanny pack tied securely under my ribs (don’t judge me, I have to put my goo somewhere.)  Instead of cheerfully accepting the excuse not to run, I shrugged my shoulders and set off.
                 Did I mention it was ace? I usually end my long runs looking like a bag lady- with bits of clothing tied to my fanny pack as I limp back to the car, beetroot read, with sweat making a break for freedom down every available limb. I ended this race wet but of a normal colour (pasty white) and I was still wearing the vest and lightweight jacket I had set off in. The only addition to my fanny pack was my baseball cap, which, in a moment of unadulterated bliss, I had taken off so that I could get my hair wet so as to further enjoy the run. I promise you readers, I did not take any drugs- recreational or otherwise before I ran, although I had consumed quite a lot of caffeine throughout the day- maybe this is the answer!
                I enjoyed the run so much that, at mile 3- when I usually hit the wall- I decided to ‘do the shuffle.’ For half a mile, I danced along, much to the scorn of passing drivers. As well as thinking ‘who runs in this weather, get a life,’ they were obviously also thinking , ‘that woman is a weirdo but my goodness, she can shuffle!’ The only fly in the ointment is that I think I have offended the woman on my micoach app thingy: she usually tells me my distance, calories burned and my pace. At mile 2 she told me I had run a 24 minute mile (I had only been running for 20 minutes so that would have been quite an achievement) and after mile 9 she didn’t even bother to tell me what my pace was. She was obviously so disgusted with my time of 2 hours and 4 minutes for 11 miles. Me, I was just happy that I made it home, soaked but smiling, ready to bore my husband with the tale!
Back on with our A-Z now folks, I may have missed a few letters but, hey, I ran 11 miles last night so I can do what I want

‘I love running’ A-Z
‘I hate running and wish that I had never signed up for this madness’ A-Z
My top 3 running tracks for women are:
Fighter: Christina Aguilera (think about running past anyone who has ever annoyed you – ha)
Dirty: Christina Aguilera  (imagine you’re a Pussycat Doll- everyone does it, don’t be ashamed)
We will rock you; Queen (use the three beat on this to set your pace)

… oh, and LMFAO’s ‘Shufflin’’ but YOU MUST shuffle when it’s on. It’s the law!  
It can’t get GPS if you’re standing too close to the house, if you stop for a drink/ wee in a bush, it tries to end your workout, if you go too slow the voice gets stroppy (it’s not just my imagination, honest) if you go too fast it doesn’t register your pace… it has more faults than a tectonic plate.
Why bother?    

Happy times x


  1. More faults than a tectonic plate - LMAO!

  2. Great post and great run Kelly! The comment on LMFAO..._"YOU MUST shuffle when it's on. It's the law!" = classic. Keep writing!