Wednesday, 17 August 2011

F is for FASTEST EVER RUN (and N is for… nearly died!)

Okay, so I didn’t nearly die… I actually saw the light. It appeared at the top of cardiac hill- after I had run my fourth consecutive 9 minute 40 something second mile. I was exhausted, I was hot, sweat was rolling from the end of my fingers and making puddles on the floor (I really have a way with words, it’s a gift.) So to be honest, the light was looking pretty attractive. Then I looked down at my pretty shoes and decided that they were a good enough reason to stay on the planet- oh and my kids and husband… of course.
                I seriously don’t know what came over me tonight. I gave blood last night so couldn’t pound my body into submission and Monday had been a rest day so I guess that I was… dare I say it… looking forward to getting out there and giving it some. And boy did I give it some. I gave it so much that now I cannot feel my legs. But hey, 5 miles in under 48 minutes has got to be worth the temporary loss of a couple of major limbs- at least I hope it’s temporary!
                Whilst I was whooshing (and I chose that word for its accuracy- I definitely whooshed) I realised that I have been neglecting my A-Z. We are starting at B because I have already covered A- if you didn’t know this, shame on you. Go to the BLOG called ‘ S is for short shorts and C is for chafe’- I'll bet you know at least one 'A is for Arses who know everything!'

‘I love running’ A-Z
‘I hate running and wish that I had never signed up for this madness’ A-Z
Booty. Your booty will be pert and gorgeous, it will be toned and muscled. You MUST take photographs of said booty and keep them in a frame so that, when you are too old to run, you will always have the fond memories of when your derriere looked like it belonged to one of the Pussycat Dolls. Go out in a short skirt, go out in a bikini, Hell, go out in a thong…but be sure to show that booty off!
Battered, bruised, boobs which will bounce out of your bra and either give you black eyes or attach themselves firmly to your knees and refuse to bounce back
Also boils! On your bum, on your face, where your bra straps have rubbed… everywhere!
Calories. As in, you can have loads and loads of them… fill your boots.
Carb loading- it IS JUST AS GOOD as the name suggests!
Collagen- you’ll literally pound the collagen out of your face apparently which is always good to remember when you’re 6 miles into a 10 mile run and everything hurts- NOT!

 Happy times x

1 comment:

  1. Another gem of a posting. Very funny.

    At your suggestion I'm off to take a photo of my booty right now so that when I'm too old to run (which will hopefully be the middle of next week so I can sit and rest instead of getting up at Stupid O'Clock to take part in this madness!) I can look back with fond memories (if I can remember that far back!)

    He-Who-Must-Be-Ignored has suggested that the nice lady at the Asda Photo outlet might not approve of this Booty-Pic idea though. We will see...