Saturday, 10 September 2011

P is for pregnancy

I’m NOT pregnant. And I’m thoroughly offended that you would even think such a thing. I’ve told you before, my fanny pack makes me look fat. It has nothing to do with me REALLY enjoying carb loading!
                I ran 6 miles tonight- 5.9 miles of which was up-hill. It hurt. A lot. And while I was running, sweating and puffing and panting, I suddenly realised that, the last time I felt so utterly wretched was four years ago when I was in labour with my daughter. I had a dawning revelation, right there and then, in the middle of the road, in the middle of climbing a mountain… running is basically the same as being pregnant! As you are aware, I’m a pretty deep thinking kind of girl so I share your surprise that I didn’t realise this before!
                Think about it: When you (or your partner/girlfriend/wife etc.) are pregnant, you can eat what you want and bitch and moan about everything and anything. When you are too tired to do the laundry/ lift the hoover/ do the dusting/ turn the dials on the oven to cook a wholesome and nutritious dinner, people understand. They make special dispensations for you. As the pregnancy progresses, you become more and more knackered then, at the end, when you just can’t take any more, you go through an excruciatingly painful ordeal for the sake of one glorious, life affirming moment. Now read back through the paragraph and replace the word ‘pregnant’ with ‘training for a 5K/10K/half marathon, full marathon, ultra-marathon…’ Do you see what I mean? As life changing experiences, pregnancy and racing are one and the same!
                The very best thing of course, is that when you have ‘given birth’ to your life affirming RUNNING moment, it doesn’t keep you awake all night for the next six months screaming to be fed. You might, however, be kept awake by backache/knee ache/cramp/toenail crustiness (delete as appropriate.) I’m not sure what’s worse!
                13 miles tomorrow and we’re forecast a hurricane! I can’t wait! Honest!

Happy times x

1 comment:

  1. Uncanny!

    I wonder where the ice baths come in...